ONE LIFE BLOG

Helen Duyvestyn Helen Duyvestyn

Where's your head at? Calming the crazy mind.

You know those times when you feel out of control?

Your thoughts are messed up. The little voice in your head is in control and won't stop chatting to you. Thoughts such as "Why did this happen to me?". "I have totally messed up!". "I'm not very good at this". "I am a bad/unworthy person". "I am not pretty/skinny/wealthy enough". "There must something wrong with me". "I am useless/hopeless/not good enough" - ad infinitum.

This often happens after a negative event; a break-up, an argument, some form of mistake or rejection. Sometimes even just a 'bad day' can increase the negative chatter.

This negative chatter is part of what I call your emotional mind (aka 'the crazy mind'). It's in control and it is taking you for a ride. Often a ride that just goes around and around the same block, for hours if not days on end. It's painful, it's soul destroying and it is totally cruel.

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Work Less, Live More
Mind Food, A Life Worth Living Helen Duyvestyn Mind Food, A Life Worth Living Helen Duyvestyn

Work Less, Live More

This has been something that has been on my mind for quite some time.

And something I have been trying to get my head around for a while.

I know so much has been written about it and I know that there have been all sorts of ideas and suggestions to 'throw away your day job and travel the world'. And that's all very well and good (if that's what you want to do). But it's not at all possible.

Is it?

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It's the small things....
Helen Duyvestyn Helen Duyvestyn

It's the small things....

One of my very favourite cartoons is this one from Michael Leunig. It encapsulates how life sometimes feels - and how - when things are very tough - it is the small things that get you through.

We are constantly challenged - on a daily basis - to rise above what we might consider our primitive response, to engage our brain, to make decisions no matter how minute on a moment to moment basis. We tackle traffic, a rude fellow human, a washing machine that breaks down mid-cycle, a phone call from a distressed friend and then we have to cope with the bigger things in life, death of a loved one, loss of a pet, dissolution of a relationship.

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How to love everything you do
Helen Duyvestyn Helen Duyvestyn

How to love everything you do

I've developed a simple rule over the past couple of years. It seems somewhat self indulgent. And I wondered for a while if it was.  But it seems to work incredibly well. So much so that I almost think that it is not possible for things to be this simple or this easy.

Quite simply; stop doing the things you don't love.

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Remember to Breathe
Health and Well-being Helen Duyvestyn Health and Well-being Helen Duyvestyn

Remember to Breathe

We've all experienced those moments. The ground moves beneath us, what we though was stable is not. As a friend hashtagged the other day #whathappenedtothecertaintiesoflife ! And it is a bit like that. We feel groundless.

Pema Chodron, Buddisht nun, teacher (and in my eyes a goddess) tells us to make friends with the groundlessness to sink into it. To breathe it all in.

If you've ever been in such a position - it is easier said than done. Some  events literally take our breathe away, as if we have been punched in the solar plexus. Our initial urge is to stop breathing, to tense, to get ready for the fight or the fligh

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Shoulda, Woulda, Coulda..... The truth about choice
A Life Worth Living, Mind Food Helen Duyvestyn A Life Worth Living, Mind Food Helen Duyvestyn

Shoulda, Woulda, Coulda..... The truth about choice

Ever get stuck on the word 'should'?

You know - I should do some exercise. I should phone my friend. I should eat some spinach.

And then the word 'must'... I must sort out my filing, I must pay attention. I must pay the bill.

The definition (according to the online dictionary) of the word 'should':

used to indicate duty, propriety, or expediency.
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